Jesus would like to welcome a guest commentator this week: His Holiness the Buddha!
There seems to be yet another hullabaloo over at Fox News. In a discussion about Tiger Woods and his restoration into the grace of the public eye, pundit Brit Hume said this week, “The extent to which he can recover, it seems to me, depends on his faith. He is said to be a Buddhist. I don’t think that faith offers the kind of forgiveness and redemption offered by the Christian faith. So, my message to Tiger, turn to the Christian faith and you can make a total recovery and be a great example to the world.”
Understandably, this angered some Buddhists.
Predictably, Ann Coulter jumped on the Brit Bandwagon and started spewing fiery red viciousness out the hole she calls her mouth. She writes: “Hume’s words, being 100 percent factually correct, sent liberals into a tizzy of sputtering rage, once again illustrating liberals’ copious ignorance of Christianity.”
Well, Jesus and the Buddha are here to set the record straight about Christianity and Buddhism. Who better to hear it from than straight from the horse’s mouth? So, grab a notebook and a pen, Ann, and take some notes from the masters.
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Hi, Ann, Jesus here. First of all, I’d like to correct you. Hume’s words are, from my perspective, 50 percent factually correct. That is, in half of what Brit is saying, he is 100 percent correct. We Christians are indeed quite forgiving. As I’ve always said, “Bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. If anyone strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also.”
Hey there, Ann, Buddha here. Boy that Jesus is really something, isn’t he? From my perspective, too, Brit is only 50 percent correct. That is, in the other half of what he’s saying–that there is no forgiveness in Buddhism–I must take offense. First of all, like Jesus, I have also always said “If robbers should attack you and cut you in pieces with a two-handed saw, limb by limb, and one of you should feel hate, such a one is not a follower of my gospel.”
I’d say that’s pretty close to the equivalent of…
Turning. One’s. Cheek.
Forgivetothaizzle.
Word. In fact I’ve also always said that “if men speak evil of you, this must you think: ‘Our heart shall not waver; and we will abide in compassion, in lovingkindness, without resentment. We will think of the man who speaks ill of us with thoughts of love, and in our thoughts of love shall we dwell. And from the abode of love we will fill the whole world with far-reaching, wide-spreading, boundless love.’” That’s pretty forgiveful, too, if I do say so, myself.
I second that emotion. So now that we’ve set the record straight on Brit, I’ve got a couple of bones to pick with you, Ann. You say that Christianity is “the best deal in the universe” because “God sent his only son to get the crap beat out of him, die for our sins and rise from the dead. If you believe that, you’re in.” Ah, don’t you always have a way with words… Okay, fair enough. All it takes to believe is just to believe. But that doesn’t have anything to do with forgiveness. Forgiveness is an act and it’s bestowed on those who follow my teachings–not just those who believe I was materialized through a virgin mother and made water into wine. Forgiveness comes by being forgiving; like I say, “Forgive, and you will be forgiven; give, and it will be given to you.” In fact it’s not so easy to just get into the Kingdom if you are merely “washing the dishes or walking the dog or just sitting there minding your own business hating Susan Sarandon,” as you say, and just accept that I’m the son of God. That’s because, “on the day of judgment you will have to give an account of every careless word you utter; for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” I think a lot of pundits who are making beaucoup dollars inciting anger and ignorance in people who don’t know any better are going to have to give an account of a lot of careless words they’ve uttered when they go up to see the big guy in the sky, if they think that’s where they’re going.
Agreed. I also want to say that anyone can be a Buddhist. It’s just like being Christian. You believe in the eight-fold path and you follow it. That’s all there is to it. You can believe some dude was sent down as God’s only son and was murdered on the cross, and follow him, or you can believe that some dude was enlightened under a tree and follow him. Neither one is inherently better or easier than the other. Whatever you choose, you have to work at it. I think I’ve said some things Tiger might be interested in. This one, for example: “From lust arises sorrow and from lust arises fear. If a man is free from lust, he is free from fear and sorrow.” And this: “When a man knows the solitude of silence and feels the joy of quietness, he is free from fear and sin and feels the joy of the dhamma.”
Another forgiving passage! Way to go, Buddha! As a final though to Ann, I would just like to sayeth:
“It is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but it is what comes out of the mouth that defiles.”
And from the Buddha:
“He who has to walk with fools has a long journey of sorrow, because to be with a fool is as painful as to be with an enemy; but the joy of being with the wise is like the joy of being with a beloved kinsman.”
Therefore the people came to Moses, and said, We have sinned, for we have spoken against the LORD, and against you; pray to the LORD, that he take away the serpents from us. And Moses prayed for the people.